BE THEY A STAFF MEMBER, CUSTOMER OR STAKEHOLDER
When a person is in a non-productive emotional state, you need to manage the emotion before attending to the problem. Following are some principles and skills to do this effectively:
1. Acknowledge the Person’s Concerns
To acknowledge is to let the person know you have heard them and understood their situation.
Examples:
-“I am sorry to hear that ….”
-“That’s terrible …”
-“It can be frustrating having to …”
-“Oh no! You must be very annoyed …”
2. Demonstrate Empathy
Empathy means to put yourself in the shoes of the other person and try to feel how they feel. For many people this is very challenging, as often when we’re being challenged we go into a defensive state.
There are two easy ways to demonstrate empathy.
Your tone of voice is critical to your success.
Phrases that show empathy:
- Talk about how you would be feeling in their situation:
-“I would feel upset too if I had to wait 5 minutes.”
or - Talk about how others have felt when they have been in the situation.
-“I know of other people who had the same problem and they were very disappointed.”
3. Partial Agreement and Acknowledgement
Partially agreeing with the other person lets them know you have heard them and to some extent, you are on their side.
When you are partially agreeing with the person you have listened/tracked for something that they have said that you can agree with. You have acknowledged them by agreeing with part of what they have said to you.
The Customer says:
-“You would have thought if I returned a camera for repair that when I received it back it would have been tested to make sure it was working!”
Service provider says:
-“You are right that the camera should be tested before being sent back.”
4. Managing Abusive People
Set boundaries
To maintain control of the situation it is important to set some boundaries for the person.
- Acknowledge their situation – “I am sorry this has happened to you.”
- Say you want to help – “I do want to help.”
- Set boundaries –
-“Although I won’t be able to help if you continue to speak to me this way.” - Suggest options –
-“Would you prefer to speak about this tomorrow or a little later this afternoon?”
5. Strategy for Presenting Bad News to Another Person
- State the situation with empathy
- Present any options that might make them feel better
- Check their agreement with the option/s
- Exit the discussion showing that you care